It’s 2003 and I’m Dreaming

While cleaning my apartment I started singing an old Damien Rice song from his album O. I then decided to put it on and sing to it while cleaning and I had a sudden flashback to when I was 17/18 in my room at my parent’s house.

I had an entire wall dedicated to posters, ticket stubs, band advertisements, and wristbands from past shows collaged onto the wall. And this wall went ridiculously high as it was in the center of the house where the two sides of the roof met. I had a hard time getting to the top of it, but thankfully my dad was a general contractor and he had access to the tallest ladders.

I remember laying on my bed with my feet against the wall looking at the posters dreaming of my future. I had a boyfriend then who was in a band, so obviously he was going to be successful and I would get to go on a tour with him and see the world. Get away from California. Get away from the depression that marked my life. Escape. You know, the usual dream of a high school punk.

What I find most surprising about this flashback is how different my life is compared to then and what I thought it would look like.

My 17-year-old self would have never dreamed she would be living in a flat in Chicago. Ever. And not only that, but as a Christian missionary.

It’s amazing to see what God has done in my life and what He continues to do. He surprises me every day and I am so incredibly grateful that He came into my life and showed me better a dream.

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